Time management tips may appeal to the perfectionist in you because of your drive to excel. But if you constantly aim for the ultimate, you know first-hand that perfectionism can actually interfere with your being as productive as you’d like to be.
That isn’t the only problem with overly high standards. Perfectionism lowers the quality of your life in the moment as you struggle to attain unrealistic goals. In fact, non-perfectionists might accomplish just as much with considerably less wear and tear: think of the missed meals, the troubled sleep, the way dissatisfaction with yourself interferes with your fully enjoying time with friends and family.
You can’t retrieve the precious moments you have lost, of course. But through assertive compassion, you can free yourself from perfectionism, one step at a time. Embark upon this heart-based journey to get there.
3 Keys to Free Yourself from Perfectionism Deadlocks
Freedom Key #1: Listen to Your Heart’s Wisdom.
Perfectionism, at its core, is based on self-critical beliefs. Recognize that the root of your perfectionism lies beneath the fear that what you produce isn’t good enough. Ultimately, it springs from the fear that you yourself are not good enough.
As you warmly accept who you are… all of you… you feel your desire for perfection starting to melt. This simple step can be quite dramatic. You assertively and compassionately stand up to your inner nagging voice, because you embrace your humanity, foibles and all.
Freedom Key #2: Welcome and Retain Validations.
Self-reference is the cornerstone of self-esteem. But if you struggle with perfectionism, try broadening your frame of reference a bit. You may obtain a more accurate overview of who you truly are from those who are not invested in you being superhuman.
So, use your thoroughness on your behalf instead of against yourself. Maintain a file of validations, compliments and thank-you notes that you have received for what you have created or accomplished. When you question the acceptability of your current project, pull out this file, read it and believe it. These affirmations counter the fear-based voice that drives your perfectionism. Work to bring these into your heart. Through this process, you will learn to give yourself the positive validations that help fuel your productivity.
Freedom Key #3: Let Go Joyfully.
Your heart is your source of inner abundance. So tap this power-house of compassionate wisdom to overcome feelings of “not enough”. Envision what you make or produce as a gift being given. Offer your project with good will and good wishes – and notice how different that feels from the anxiety and distress that permeates perfectionism.
These three keys require courage to use, initially. You must face that you have forfeited your power to a part of yourself that hurts you. But once you own this insidious pattern, and compassionately resolve to give yourself something better, change will occur!
Few challenges are more rewarding than engaging in assertive compassion on your own behalf. It will brighten your day and ground you more fully in the present. And your productivity will increase, as well. So overcoming perfectionism is a fight worth fighting!
Now, what can you do to proactively protect your time from unfair demands today?© Copyright 2011 Paula Eder, Ph.D.