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Interpersonal Skills Articles |
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It is impossible to experience how other people perceive the world. While you can (and should!) gain an intellectual understanding and a sincere appreciation of perceptual differences, you cannot have the actual experience of someone else’s perception. The fourth principle of PST is: Everyone believes that their way of experiencing the world is the right way and (until they learn differently) the only way!
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Each person sees the world from a different perceptual style. Bill’s Perceptual Style is Flow. He perceives a world of unity and relationships in which every piece is connected to every other piece; a rich world where the parts fit together and support and nourish each other. He trusts in the flow of experience and believes what is important and necessary will emerge as a matter of course as it reflects the underlying harmony and cooperation inherent in the world. He knows the relationships he sees are not always obvious, especially to others, and that they reveal themselves only through his patient careful attention, and even then only slowly, in hints, intimations, and whispers. Learn how do understand and deal with people like Bill.
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Each person sees the world from a different perceptual style. Karen’s Perceptual Style is Goals. She perceives the world as a series of tasks that must be completed at all costs. Nothing else has higher priority. She thrives on challenges and opportunities posed by immediate problems that need solving and believes that there is one right way to solve them. She sees a world of clear, simple options, with little ambiguity and little gray. She knows that the right way is the simplest and most direct one. When the central issues have been addressed the problem is solved; the details are unimportant and will take care of themselves. Learn how do understand and deal with people like Karen.
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Each person sees the world from a different perceptual style. Kathy’s Perceptual Style is Vision. She perceives the world as a place of infinite possibilities full of options and opportunities all of which build toward her vision of the future. She is an explorer and adventurer who is not thrown by surprises or the unexpected. Kathy sees life as a constant challenge to which she must react quickly and instinctively. What moves her most is the opportunity to have impact, make a difference, and leave her mark. In a world of possibilities, she is excited about turning them into realities. Learn how do understand and deal with people like Kathy.
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In the process of gathering knowledge and striving to understand our world and our lives, human beings categorize. We do this as part of science – think of plant classifications, animal classifications, cloud types, soil types, food groups, etc. Creating categories is akin to shorthand. Each category has certain detailed characteristics that allow us to quickly understand commonalities and take action based on knowledge of the category. Without the existence of categories, we all would be left to gathering our own knowledge through trial and error on a situation-by-situation basis. And we’d have no way to discuss common experience or facts. The same is true about understanding human behavior.
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Because Perceptual Style is innate, it determines what natural capacities, skills, and abilities we have. Just what do we mean by innate? You are born with it. It’s part of who you are. Just like any other part of you, it grows as you develop. So at age 3 for example, you definitely weren’t aware of it, but as your life experience grows, so does your use of the natural preferences of your Perceptual Style.
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Each person sees the world from a different perceptual style. Frank’s style is Activity. As the name suggests, Frank is a very active person, he is always on the go. His friends comment that watching him is like watching a pinball machine as he bounces from topic to topic and from person to person. He’s always in motion moving from moment to moment energetically. To Frank the world is a dynamic and exciting place full of experience, connections, and relationships. Because the patterns and connections are constantly changing, Frank knows that he cannot absorb the richness of the experience unless he is engaged and participating in it. He finds observation and analysis dull and lifeless, and there is too much to do, see, and experience to waste his time with them. Learn how do understand and deal with people like Frank.
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Each person sees the world from a different perceptual style. Susan’s style is Adjustments. She sees the world as a complex system of objective processes and systems that function smoothly without interference or action from her. She is a keen and thoughtful observer of the world and believes the complexity she perceives can only be known if she is given the time to gather complete information about its details and intricacies. In the face of her experience, Susan is driven to acquire complete information about life’s processes and to gather the knowledge that comes with understanding it. She knows that such understanding comes only with patient study of the complexity and details of the objective world around her. Learn how do understand and deal with people like Susan.
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Each person sees the world from a different perceptual style. Bob's style is Methods. He perceives the world in a rational, matter-of-fact manner and sees a world that is sensible, logical, and factual. Things are what they are. His great strength is determining objectives and establishing a course of action that systematically leads to the desired result. He sees a world of things to be done, projects to be carried out, responsibilities to master, and tasks to perform all of which require solid, well-structured plans. Learn how do understand and deal with people like Bob.
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It never ceases to amaze me how often people are their own harshest critics and assume some level of failure because they haven’t found the level of success or happiness they expect in life.
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Have you ever been in a disagreement with someone and felt that you were living on entirely different planets and experiencing an entirely different event? We’ve all been there, attempting to prove our point and convince someone that we are “right,” with no success. The trouble is often times we really HAVE experienced a situation or event differently. This is because of a difference in Perceptual Style.
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The power of gratitude and appreciation is a great power indeed. It opens doors and new possibilities in your life. The Law of Attraction states that "like attracts like". If you are gracious and appreciative and let others know it, the positive energy you create will attract more positive things to you.
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Have you ever gotten upset with a colleague for not responding to an email or phone call? What about someone cutting corners or not being honest with you? I know I get really irritated when people are inconsiderate of my time. What about you? There are a few things you can do to remedy minor, yet aggravating, situations that include other people.
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There are many skills it takes to grow, sustain, and build a business. Everything from marketing, mindset, and math has to be in play to make real money and a real difference. All of the education, time, and money you have put into growing your business won't much matter if you don't embody this - tenacity!
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Now please notice I didn't ask, how intelligent are you? That's an entirely different question. Our culture puts a great deal of weight on assessments given to you when you're in school...I.Q. tests, S.A.T.s, A.C.T.s...alphabet soup. This is unfortunate. These tests only measure a portion of the different types of intelligences including linguistic and logical-mathematical intelligences.
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As a person, your success, or failure, depends in part on how well you adapt to change. Do you run screaming like a banshee towards it, ready to conquer? Or do you go sit in a closet, close your eyes and wait for it to go away, hoping that everything will return to "normal"?
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Entrepreneurship requires a certain personality and a willingness to see plans and problems from more than one point of view. Being an entrepreneur also requires courage. Sue talks about the top three courage-builders for her own businesses and why personal growth is required to be a successful entrepreneur.
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Every business owner needs both charisma and leadership to be effective in the marketplace, but what does this mean?
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What if you could strengthen significant connections and enjoy heightened productivity by enhancing your authenticity? It may be easier than you think! Learn 5 ways that authenticity can help you reap the benefits and also avoid the potential pitfalls of professional relationships.
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Let’s face it — being sensitive has never been highly accepted in a world that is not so sensitive. I believe that is going to change. Actually, it is changing. The energy in the world is shifting and sensitivity is heightened these days – even for those who have not previously considered themselves to be highly sensitive. We are going back to our true nature. So why should you care if you fall into this group?
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No doubt you've heard sayings about happiness and the power of positive thinking. For instance, "when life gives you lemons, make lemonade" and "some pursue happiness, others create it." Turns out that optimism truly is a powerful force. And, regardless of your circumstances or personal setbacks, you can choose to approach life with a sunny outlook, transforming negative thoughts into positive ones and increasing your chances of success. Still not convinced? Here are five findings that prove the power of positivity.
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If you want to be successful, you have to genuinely care about others.
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Every day you are faced with making decisions in your business. You are looking over your year and planning the next program you want to offer your clients. Do I launch it in this month or that month? Do I support it with this marketing strategy or do I use that one? Which virtual assistant do I hire? We search for information, ideas and resources outside of us and then at some point you have to bring it inside and make your own decision. This is where a well developed sense of your intuition to support your decisions is critical to your success. Here are 7 steps to help you hone your intuitive sense.
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Here are some tips for overcoming the insidious paralysis of perfectionism.
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What is the key to earning more, achieving higher success and happiness? We can summarize in one word: optimism. Here are 7 simple, actionable tips to help you boost your optimism and see all kinds of wonderful results.
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Doers or Thinkers. Who is in a better position to succeed in work and life? What do you think?
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Empathy
- Alicia Smith
Having compassion and empathy for the customers and clients you work with will support them in accessing their own personal power. All people deserve that extra ounce of respect and understanding.
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Recently I heard someone comment that another friend had been ‘giving away her power’ by continuing to remain angry at someone who’d done her wrong. She’d stayed stuck in a complete lack of forgiveness. The comment really made me stop and think …for forgiving others isn’t just what we’re ‘supposed’ to do – it actually does make us feel good about ourselves. So, naturally, my next thought was to apply this to the process of marketing and building your business. Here are a few beliefs that bleed your power. See if you recognize any.
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Most people have strengths and weaknesses, whether in business or in life. And, most people would say “I’ll work on the weaknesses to bring them up to par.” Not exactly the best route to go!
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Learn 4 ways to increase your awareness and change your attitude.
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It is important to set clear boundaries with clients. Here are 3 straight-to-the-point tips for handling boundary-pushing clients with "Gracious Strength".
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Here are five factors which, when practiced consistently in your life, will help you tap into the giant creativity reservoir you have within.
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What *is* essential about who I am and how do I stay connected with what's true and essential and core about who I am. while at the same time growing and adapting and changing with my environment?
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We live in a society that tends to "bond over stress instead of success". We give each other permission to complain freely- it's actually become the way we interact with others. While each of these little snippets of conversation seem meaningless, when you look at an entire day it can really add up to a negative outlook on life. With this negative way of thinking it can be hard to believe in our dreams, be truly happy and feel gratitude for our life.
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Some people need to be right whether they are or not. They're so defensive, it's a real challenge to get them to address any problem. Here are a successful team leader's strategies for sidestepping their defensiveness.
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Games are an opening to our true natures. In games we can react immediately rather than with a careful response. Reactions often depend on your view of the game. If the game is seen as a one-time event, why not be brutal? But if this event is one in a series, then cooperation is clearly the better long-term strategy.
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What does being punctual say about you? It shows that you care, are professional, and that your habit is your brand among many other positive qualities of a business owner. Being punctual can show that your customer is important to you.
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Long lasting relationships with your prospect is the goal of successful marketing. When you are not excited about what you are doing, it makes a successful marketing campaign almost impossible. By remembering what your passion for your business is, communicated through your attitude, you can be more successful in your marketing goal.
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Cattiness is a trait that can include any number of behaviors. When you think about how you come across to the people you interact with you can avoid the unfortunate behaviors involved in cattiness. By following some simple rules you can avoid being accused of this trait and enhance all of your interactions.
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Our ego can get in the way of marketing our business. From our need to be right, to talking about ourselves incessantly; coming from an attitude of arrogance to getting attached to the outcomes of what we do, these are just some of the ways our ego can get in our way. Learn to use your ego in a healthy way that plays on your strengths and not your weaknesses.
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Judgment is the process of forming an opinion of something by making a comparison. Judgments are based on thoughts we hold about people and things. How do judgments of yourself, clients, colleagues, and strategic partners get in the way of your success? Before we can understand that, it's important to understand the underpinnings of why we judge in the first place.
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You may not realize how your behavior and attitude affects your bottom line. But, we know that "kvetching" behavior will hinder your business every time. Read here to learn some simple techniques that can turn this behavior around and increase sales.
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Perfectionism can get in the way of building or marketing a successful business. It can prevent us from moving ahead quickly or from taking advantage of business opportunities. . Instead of striving for perfection, consider adopting an attitude of striving for excellence. Look at failure as just another teacher. Let's explore how being less than perfect can move you ahead in your business!
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All Coaches make mistakes, but the key is learning from your mistakes. If you allow yourself to learn from your mistakes you will become a better coach in a much shorter amount of time.
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"Kendall, how DO you get it all done?!" I hear this question all the time. At first I didn't see what the big deal was and lightly shrugged the question off. But over time, I see that how I run my business is VERY different than how a lot of people run theirs.
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Are you ever asked to volunteer for something or work on a project you didn't want to do? Did you feel pressured to say yes when you really wanted to say no? Maybe you needed the money, didn't want to disappoint someone, or the old guilt thing? If you struggle to find the words to say no, read on.
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Learn how the relationships you create affect your success.
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Communication is a critical factor in building professional and personal relationships. So often misunderstandings, conflicts and mis-connections arise around communication. Learn one of the critical factors that can make or break a conversation in an instant.
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Are you a great listener or a big talker? Listening is one of the key factors in forging strong relationships in your business and personal life. If you're turning off people in your life, it's costing you more than you realize. Learn tips to becoming a great listener!
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If you want your business to succeed, your indiscretions need to stop. Remember Mom's old adage "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything"? Your Mom was right! Learn strategies to monitor your indiscretions.
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Whether you are saying no to a colleague asking you to do something, or saying no to a potential client that you really don't want to have, the ability to say no gracefully is a key skill when you are in business as a solo entrepreneur. Here are four quick steps to learning this skill.
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Get Your Free Ebook Now!
You'll also get our popular weekly ezine with the latest articles and teleclasses for solo entrepreneurs (See
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be shared. Unsubscribe
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