Do you ever wonder why so many book authors and eZine editors include so many quotations in their work? (Just read my How to Get the Word Out About Who You Are and What You Do eBook to see what I mean.)
It’s because those quotations have inspired them for one reason or another. Take this one that I saw a few days ago:
“Nobody knows what you want except you. And nobody will be as sorry as you if you don’t get it. Wanting some other way to live is proof enough of deserving it. Having it is hard work, but not having it is sheer hell.” — Lillian Hellman
That one stopped me in my tracks and got me to thinking about how we deny ourselves the very things we want most.
Coaching clients have often come to me because they were wanting to gain clarity around what they want to do with their lives, especially their working and business life. So many people tell me they have no idea what they want. I’ve just gone through a period of that self-doubt-questioning-angst-frustrated feeling myself, and what I came to realize is that I’ve always known exactly what I want, I’ve just been too afraid to admit it.
Too often when we share our innermost desires, we hear back from people who love us and from people whom we respect things like, “You couldn’t possibly want THAT” or worse, “You could never do-be-have (take your pick) THAT” or even worse, “Just who do you think you are?”
I suspect then, that for many other people like me, they, too, really DO know exactly what they want but are too afraid to admit it to anyone else, like their partner or spouse or parents or children, or any other person who appears to hold some sway or influence over them.
The other issue — and perhaps a bigger challenge — for many people is that we have no idea how to go about getting what it is that we want. We think we have to know all the answers in advance and have a plan — in advance — for achieving or getting something. The reality is that if we just open ourselves to the idea that it really is okay to have what we want, then the Universe will actually find a way to make that very thing happen.
If you find yourself in a position where you are questioning yourself about what you want, take a few minutes to ask yourself these questions, and listen for the answer:
If I was single and/or had no responsibilities for other people, what would I be doing?
What do I want people to say about me when I’m dead and gone? How do I want them to remember me?
If you’re open to it, there is an immense amount of freedom to be found in your answers to those questions.
© Copyright 2009 Marty Marsh